Welcome to Envision. Last update: 07.10.01 


A collection of random
vents, essays, drawings, editorials,
etc. that have little or nothing 
to do with anything . . .


(Warning, this rant may be a little ecchi/lemon but that isn't my fault. Blame it on the Policy Debaters! They picked the topic! And what topics they were . . . O.O!)

Team Policy Debate
What's more exciting than watching grass grow? Well . . . just about anything . . . except Team Policy Debate!!! Let me say, if you want a laugh so hard you cry or at the very least fall asleep, watch a policy debate team . . .

Oh my . . . ::beats her head against the shoulder of the bishonen nearest to her:: what a total waste of an hour (actually two hours, one per team)! Thank goodness Shorty was there or I'd have gone completely insane. See, yesterday the founders of Envision were helping out at a speech tournament . . . (when I say founders I mean myself, Shorty, and Otaku In Training) I got to be a judge, which may not have been the best thing for me to do . . . hee hee hee . . . ::chuckles insanely:: and Shorty talked the person in charge into letting her be my time keeper.

These policy debaters are really something . . . I just don't know what exactly. ^_^*. They've definitely got issues, let me tell you!

I was able to judge the debate of three topics. First was a pre-selected one (thank goodness) on hate speeches. That was alright, especially since it was my first time judging and I had no clue what I was doing. The second debate was on . . . lifting the ban on shounen ai (of course, they didn't say "shounen ai" or "yaoi" . . .). >_<! A whole hour listening to how it was/wasn't an invasion of privacy to walk in on and ban shounen ai practices. The third was on how it was/wasn't an invasion of privacy to watch potential employees take a urinalisis for a manditory drug test. >_< again! And if that wasn't bad enough . . .

One guy talked so fast I thought I was losing my mind! I'm not kidding . . . eight minutes full of intolerable babble with occational words that stood out. He was saying every word but it was so fast that I couldn't make it all out . . . which isn't good when you're a judge . . . ::chuckles insanely and checks off a box on her paper:: minus points for being unitelligable! At least I could make out the fact that he was going a bit off topic. ::checks off another box:: Minus more points! This guy's speech went something like this:

"Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah dictionary blah blah blah blah blah blah definition blah blah blah blah blah blah blah privacy blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah watching someone go to the restroom blah blah blah blah  who cares? Blah blah blah . . ."

Eight minutes of nothing but talking like that. To make matters worse, I was tired. Any speeches that were made already automatically sounded like that. So when he talked super-fast, I thought, "Forget it!"

Meanwhile . . . over in Shorty's world of timing . . . she was feverishly cracking out a hilarious comic strip about the debaters . . . Soon as she scans it we'll put it up. We were also thinking about sequals to it.

Oh before I sign off, I'd like to give you some (very random) words of advice (if you'd call them that) that were given to us on the conclusion of the tournament yesterday by our friend who attached them with post-it notes to Envision's foreheads . . .

First post-it:
Otaku In Training: "Hey, what does it say?"
Hitomi-sama: "I am Otaku In Training."
Another post-it:
Otaku In Training: "What does it say?"
Shorty: "Please stop asking me."
Third post-it:
Shorty: "What does this thing say?"
Otaku In Training: "Turn around."
Shorty: (turns around) "So what does it say?"
Still another post-it:
Otaku In Training: "Alright, what does it say?"
Hitomi-sama: "I'll tell you for a fee."
One more post-it:
Shorty: "What does it say?"
Otaku in Training: "Pay me and I'll tell you."
Okay, last post-it (I promise):
Hitomi-sama: "What does mine say?"
Shorty: "Please move, you're blocking my view."
Hitomi-sama: (hits anonymous friend)

Okay, so what have we learned? #1, never watch team debate unless you're really really desperate for something . . . #2, policy debaters are sick and twisted and need to seek medical attention . . . #3, don't let Hitomi-sama judge debate when she's tired . . . she just ends up docking debaters left and right . . . #4, if debaters start talking about shounen ai, that's generally the sign for you to run to the nearest exit, leave, and lock the team debaters inside . . . #5, people who talk fast and have nothing to say are really really messed up . . . #6, never give an anonymous friend a pad of post-it notes when he's smiling insanely . . .