The advice column has disclaimers?!? Good lord! Yeah, gomen ne minna.
All the characters and the like that have to do with "Marvel vs. Street
Fighter" don't belong to me they belong to other people. But that game
was so fun!!! Hee hee hee . . .
***********************************************************************
Send ideas etc. to: Hitomi_sama@hotmail.com (RE: Slayers advice)

			      Ask the Slayers
			    Advice for 1.16-1.31

Gatti: "Here we are again minna. Demo, we decided that we needed a
little break and opted to take our work with us while we went out for
some good food."

Guimel: "Pizza!!! Yum!!!" (sniffs the steamy cheese and licks his lips)

Shesta: "Hitomi-sama!!! Pizza's here!!!"

Hitomi: (from far away inside the arcade) "Not now, Shesta! I'm kicking
Miguel's butt here!!!" (buttons can be heard being feverishly pushed in
succession) "Go Sakura! Go! Do your combo! Here it comes! Shine!!!"

Miguel: "Iie!!!" (punches the machine in defeat) "I thought you said
Spiderman was good, Viole. I should've picked Bison like I was going
to."

Viole: (chuckling evilly) "You should've, loser. Don't you know by now
not to listen to me?"

Dallet: "I don't think you could've won even with Bison."

Hitomi: "Hai!!! Sakura and Ryu kick-"

Shesta: "Hitomi-sama! Pizza's gonna get cold."

Hitomi: "Matte, I still have an extra turn!!! Woo hoo!!! Sakura and Ryu
verses . . . it can't be! Spiderman and Bison! I'm gonna getcha!!!"

Miguel: "Bison?!?" (starts chuckling) "Go get 'er Bison!"

::Hitomi, Viole, and Dallet all look at Miguel with dangerous faces::

Miguel: "Uh . . . go Hitomi-sama!"

Hitomi: "That's better. Go! Go! Oh, here comes Ryu. You're gonna get it
now! Do the combo! Come on! Here! Four hits! Ten hits!! Thirteen
hits!!! SEVENTEEN HITS!!!!"

Dallet: "She's good."

Viole: "No joke."

Miguel: "Now I know why I lost."

Hitomi: "ANOTHER TWENTY HITS!!! YOU'RE MINE!!!"

Shesta: (wanders into the arcade, a piece of stringy cheese hanging
from his open mouth as he watched Ryu beat the crap out of Bison)
"Hitomi-sama's really into that, isn't she?"

Dallet: "Thirty thousand points? What do YOU think?"

Shesta: "I wanna play after she's done." (pulls out a fistful of
quarters)

::The rest of the Slayers that are in the arcade see this and swarm
around Shesta::

Miguel: "Shesta-kun, buddy. Mind loaning me a couple of them there
quarters?"

Dallet: "Yeah, be a pal and share Shest'."

Viole: "That's what friends are for. Sing it with me."

::Miguel, Dallet, and Viole join hands and start swaying back and forth
in a ridiculously slow wave while singing "That's What Friends Are
For"::

Shesta: "Fine." (hands them all quarters) "Have fun, PALS." (mumbling
to himself) "Maybe that'll keep their minds off of beating me into the
ground for a while."

Gatti: "Is anyone going to eat besides me and Guimel?"

Everyone at the same time: "No! We're playing here! We'll be done in a
sec!"

Gatti: "Is anyone going to do work here besides me and Guimel?"

Everyone: "No!"

Guimel: (patting Gatti on the shoulder) "Gomen, Gatti. You're on your
own with this one." (resumes sprinkling his pizza with way too much
parmesan cheese)

Gatti: (grumbling to himself) "I'm not doing this by myself. I may be
the leader here but there are places where I draw the line. Doing all
the work is one of them."

Viole: (coming and sitting down next to a rather ticked Gatti)
"Shimatta, ran out of quarters. I don't see why Shesta can't let me
just have one more, I know he's got a whole pocketful of them! Tell me
he ran out . . . Shesh, he's going to get it."

Gatti: "Frankly Viole, when it comes to playing video games you suck."

Viole: "Hey, shut up. You take that back."

Gatti: "I will not." (angrily hands Viole a piece of paper with typing
on it) "Here, you help me do the work."

Viole: "Aw man! Why me?"

Gatti: "Because no one else is man enough to help me."

Viole: (hitting his chest) "Yep, well . . . since you put it that way
and . . . I'm ten times the man the rest of these little boys think
they are."

Gatti: (sweat-dropping) "And one hundred times as conceited."

Viole: (ignoring Gatti's comment) "Yes well, anyway . . . our question
comes from an e-mailer . . . thank you for writing in . . . we
appreciate mail here at the studio. They say, 'Slayers' . . . a 'dear'
could have been nice . . ."

Gatti: "You baka!" (slaps Viole upside the head) "The point is they
wrote in! BE NICE!" (smiles at the reader) "You'll have to excuse
Viole. He's the most blunt and crude Slayer in the ranks."

Viole: "And proud of it." (smiles) "Anyway . . . 'Slayers, I have a
little problem. Well, actually it's a very big problem that I can't
seem to escape. I'm constantly being bombarded with . . . Pokémon.
They're everywhere I turn. All I hear is Pokémon talk! I see Pokémon
everywhere!'"

Gatti: "Poor writer."

Viole: "Yeah, we know how that feels. We've got a certain Pokémaniac on
our hands here at the studio ourselves. . . named SHESTA!"

Gatti: "Do they say anything else?"

Viole: "Hai. 'Pokémon is driving me . . . even more insane than I
already am.' You should talk to Hitomi-sama. She's got the same
problem." (throws the paper over his shoulder and starts giving out
advice like he knows what he's talking about)

Gatti: (takes the paper and examines it closely) "Um, Viole . . ."

Viole: "Here's what you do. Carry around a gigantic mallet and whenever
you see Pokémon, let 'em have it. If someone starts babbling about it
to you, feel free to whack 'em on the head once or twice. Hell, hit 'em
one hundred and fifty times if they go so far as to mercilessly name
all the monsters like SOMEONE NAMED SHESTA did."

Gatti: "Uh . . . Viole . . ."

Viole: "I'm trying to give advice here, what is it?!?"

Gatti: "This IS from Hitomi-sama."

Viole: (grabs the paper and reads it) "NANI?!!?"

Gatti: "This is the second time in a row. Okay, I'm making it a point
to read the e-mail addresses and names BEFORE reading the question.
Shesh."

Viole: "Don't worry, Gatti. I think Hitomi-sama will love the idea of
the mallet. I'm not so sure Shesta will but . . . that's just too bad,
ne?"

Hitomi: "WOO HOO!!!"

::Viole, Guimel, and Gatti exchange glances::

Guimel: "Sounds like she won again."

Hitomi: "GATTI!!! VIOLE!!! GUIMEL!!! Come see this! I've got the three
highest scores on this machine!!! Look!!! Come here!!!"

Gatti: "She what? No way." (abandoning the pizza and rushing into the
arcade)

Viole: (following close behind along with Guimel) "Pretty good for
playing that game for the first time, wouldn't you say?"

Gatti: (peeking his head out of the arcade for a moment) "That's all
the advice for now. Send us in your ideas and we'll see you on the
first of February." (going back into the arcade) "That's incredible! I
don't believe my eyes."

All Slayers: "That's Hitomi-sama, what can we say?"



(c) 2000 Hitomi-sama